" THY WILL BE DONE Do the rest for me "
August 26, 2008
It was Tuesday, September 17, 2002 my first day of Catechetical Classes at VPES Gr. IV. After a whole day of rigid teaching (8Classes) I had to rush up to my prayer meeting, which ended at 7:30 Pm. To my amazement, I noticed a small bloody spot right end of my bra. I hurriedly look at my right breast and found a small sore. I was not nervous at all knowing that I kept this lump for 44 years with the thought that it is an ordinary lump. Dr. Ascutia advised not to have it operated way back 1959.
I immediately called up my daughter, Cleo Wednesday informing her of my situation. We traveled Wednesday evening reached our place in Cedar, Thursday morning. James and Cleo accompanied me to the doctor at St. Luke’s James selected one surgeon not knowing that he is from Daet, a native of san Vicente and well known as one of the best surgeon of St. lukes. He is Dr. Natalino Alegre a diplomate –
I was admitted at St. Luke’s on Oct 3, 2002 at 3:00 PM. I could not describe my feeling I know I have been praying a lot in all my life but the whole night of October 3, I was not able to sleep early. I had to take ½ of the pill given by the nurse. Behind my faith and trust him, I have that feeling of fear, of what might happen and the pains that I might suffer. Zeus my son had to remind that my faith can save me all the way. He had to read the bible for me to meditate the words and to deepen my trust to God. My hands and feet felt cold until I fell asleep.
I woke up the following morning all set and ready for the operation. No fear and with strong faith that he is beside me. Suddenly Fr. John called up before I was brought to the operating room. His message gave me the hope that God really loves me because people whom I know were praying for me and my priest friends were praying daily during their Eucharistic celebrations. Those moves show the presence and love of God. So I silently prayed “Let your will be done Lord and what I cannot do, do the rest for me ‘I thank him for giving me 13 beautiful children who always there for me supporting all the way. They are God given gift to me. I was taken to the operating room 12:30 p.m. after I was given injections I was not nervous telling myself that God is beside me.
Present were nine of my children. I met my anesthesiologist at the OR she is sweet and talked a lot perhaps to console me and to make me feel comfortable. I did not know what happened next….
I woke up chilling and the first words that I uttered “ Thank you Lord “ thank you God the father, God the Son and the holy spirit, thank you my angel, thank you doctors. I asked where my doctors were and someone informed me that they were still operating another patient. I closed my eyes again and after a while I found my self in my room already. My children were telling me that I have been speaking English. They were laughing at themselves because they had different level of emotions fearing about hypertension and blood sugar more so for my left and right breast had to be in the process of mastectomy. According to them my operation lasted for 6 long hours and my surgeon seemed very much tired and perspired a lot. He did a thorough cleaning and scraping of the tissues of my breast. He sampled 10 nodes from my right breast and found all of them negative from my left breast out of nine two are positive to cancer.
I stayed for five days at St. Luke’s luckily, I did not feel any pain after the operation. At times I felt bit uncomfortable for it took me a while to find the right sleeping position. I need help all the time it took me a longer time to wash up, to shower and to dress by myself alone. I walked so slowly like robot and it was unthinkable for a person like me to do things in slow motion. It seemed to be on the go during the days passed, running after church activities and in out of the parish. I was chosen as delegate of the first diocesan synod but then God did not permit me so my alternate took my place. I was never without work and for the first time I had to stay home, visit the hospital for rigid blood test and check up and rest.
I needed to stay home for my health to recover and to undergo 6 cycles of chemotherapy. While having this chemotherapy, a deeper reflection of my faith is happening deep inside me. There is that deeper trust in him and I know that a bigger and deeper healing is happening in me. God’s intervention is in me all the way. And thank God, I noticed all of these because everything is in slow motion. I’ve soon realized that all events of my life were rearranged under God’s plan, the architect of your own life. All these random moments arranged themselves in such a preparations for my soul to be natured and purified.
TO MY 13 CHILDREN & LOVED ONES
To all my 13 children, sons and daughters in law,
At this point in time, I would like to express my deepest gratitude and thanks for the support, love and concern extended to me at the moment when I needed you most. With your move, I could see the presence of God.
Many seasons come in my life and I want to give thanks to all of you who always shared happiness on me and give strength and bountiful blessing through out the years. I love you all!
Your selfless love has given me the courage to have a good fight against Cancer. You have given me the strength and hope to survive through the coming years.
Perhaps, God permitted this to happen to me to give us all the deepest TRUST. If we have everything, and everything goes smoothly in life, we will never know what it means to really TRUST him. We have also realized the essence of sharing and cooperation in family. Heavy burdens become lighter dib a?
I have gone through different seasons in life. Season of happiness and joy, season of poverty, hardship and trials, and now comes the season of having a CANCER. Just like other seasons, these would soon end. God on the other hand, is not a season, his kingdom is for eternity. His love and mercy is eternal, so conversion and faith should be for eternity. Always put our life in Gods hands!!
Remember, also that each of us have been given blessing. Some have received MORE, others LESS but all received something unique gift from God. Hence, GOD never ask our ability or inability to give but just our availability. With these, I’m once more thankful for making yourself available to give something for my 6 cycle chemotherapy whatever amount you have shared is highly appreciated! Thank you all so much!
“I have held many things in my hand and lost them all, but the things I have places in GOD’S hands, those I always posses!!!!
